comfort zone

Friday again, already? Having a break from school just within reach provides some serious motivation, which is much needed. Everyone talks about this 'senioritis' deal, but what about us Juniors? Don't we deserve some sort of diagnosis? Junior pox. Juniorization. Flujunior. Juniorphobia (okay, I'm not scared to be a junior..). Well, whatever the name, I'm feeling it!

Been reading this awesome devotional with First Christian Church, "The Relationship Principles of Jesus." I highhhhly recommend it! This past week was focused on judgement (I'm a little behind, don't.... judge...). It brought up the point of why we as christians are sometimes more likely to be judgmental--"Because they have forgotten how deeply they need God's grace." I cannot forget how much I need his forgiveness and I cannot deny to actually recognize that I have sinned and really believe I have been forgiven. If I can see the truth, I become more merciful, and less judgmental. "Mercy triumphs over judgment!" (James 2:13) So true, huh?

Ah, and the self test section.

I have only made it to question two ( there are like, twenty or eighty questions..). I'm stuck on the "Questions about Ignoring the Plank in My Eye". There are a lot. When I really thought about this just in general yesterday, I was just..disgusted, really. Or at least at first. Then I decided to actually read the question

-- "What do I know to be true that I'm pretending is not true...

1) In my relationship with others 2) In my relationship with God? 3) In my thought life?

...And that's as far as I got. I absolutely could not believe how stumped I was, and still kind of am. How I am so, so quick to focus on the sin of others just so I can hide from my own. So, I started thinking a little more, and realized at the heart of it (I think there's a lot more, but for now..)

I've managed to put God outside my comfort zone. I've been pretending I'm totally comfortable, but something is off. Somewhere my heart has hardened. Then, it hit me. It's not comfortable to let someone else take control of your life. It's way more comfortable to be stubborn in my ways and continue to keep God in this confined, emotionless bubble.

The times I've felt the closest and just wondered how I was ever not so in love with God is when I've trusted him most, and when I give him control and let him turn down the roads I would never have chosen on my own.

I also realize I've sought comfort in other people. It's so strange how when someone enters your comfort zone, the walls around your heart seem to literally melt away. It's great to have relationships within your range of comfort, and those relationships will test you for sure, but something about not knowing is almost exciting now. I don't think God was ever meant to be inside my comfort zone. Yes, he provides comfort, and I long to experience a confident relationship that's genuine, but he also loves to challenge our minds, our hearts, our sincerity. It's how he allows us to see where we need his wisdom and how he will grow us up in him.

Main Entry:	comfort zone1
Part of Speech:	n
Definition: "	the range of temperature within which an environment is comfortable for most people with no heating or cooling necessary What if everything in your life was continuously constant? Nothing about you ever changed. I cannot imagine. I need and crave this heating, and cooling. I want God to put me in uncomfortable situations, an unknown environment so my faith may be established. I may break a sweat, experience some discomfort, but that way he can be the one to cool me off and provide the anecdote he knows I need. Maybe it's gatorade, or maybe just some water instead. Ha, strange analogy, but it kind of makes sense...maybe:) Or maybe I should just go workout. And drink gatorade. :) "Now may our Lord Jesus Christ himself, and God our Father, who loved us and gave us eternal comfort and good hope through grace, comfort your hearts and establish them in every good work and word." 2 Thes 2:16-17 I'll post again soon. his love!